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US commemorates 20 years of collective punishment of Muslims

Johnathan J. Crowe - AlHudood’s Correspondent on Really Super Superpowers

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The US launched yesterday country-wide festivities commemorating the initiation of its wrath and collective punishment on Muslims and Arabs, which conveniently leashed out following the 9/11 attacks carried out by a small group of Saudis and other strategic allies living in caves and training camps in Afghanistan.

American officials cut the ribbon to the carnival ground, a derby that hosts games for all ages. Among the games were drone strike simulators, an arcade on the adventures of Captain America igniting a sectarian conflict and a kiosk with tiny Iraqi detainees in place of the stuffed animals of Whac-A-Mole. The main attraction was a to-scale skill game where players harass Arab-looking passengers, forcing them to sit in tight interrogation rooms for hours before boarding a 30-minute flight.

The spokesman of the September 11 Committee, F. U. Howitzer declared the carnival’s biggest prize an all-expenses-paid trip to Nevada, where the lucky winner gets to use a real joystick controlling a real drone to strike evil terrorists hiding out in some school somewhere in Yemen, or Libya, or wherever the lucky strike may land.

“Prior military experience is not a prerequisite”, he said, “It’s fairplay as long as the drone hovers above one of the breeding grounds for terrorism identified by the US.”

Howitzer confirmed that the US’ collective punishment policy is purely non-discriminatory “it’s not just the Arabs or the Muslims, we are better than all other races” he added.