Ethnic cleansing and crimes against humanity fail to register as provocation

In a new, unremarkable revelation, massive human rights violations, including ethnic cleansing and crimes against humanity, aren’t enough to register as a ‘provocation’ on the moral compass of right-leaning, left-leaning, or even centrist publications. Unlike the real provocations we see in that region, such as Palestinians praying in their mosque or going to the International Criminal Courts to demand prosecution of Israeli war crimes.

"Those words were chosen carefully over the years to have a real impact when heard," said James Tortin, a UN spokesperson, "but they have such a breezy lightness to them in relation to Palestine."

"Provocation is such a strong word," commented Katharine Beelo, a BBC journalist, while sipping on her ethically sourced coffee. "We reserve it for situations for people whom our audience can relate to, not splurged out whenever human rights are trampled upon."

Over in the US, a Fox News anchor tweeted, “We adhere to a strict code: 'If our friends do it, it's self-defense; if our foes do it, it’s terrorism.' Keeps things simple and headlines snappy."

Meanwhile, Ursula von der Leyen expressed her surprise that people out there actually get provoked by systemic violence and displacement. "People there normally have bigger daily concerns, like whether Israel will allow them to receive electricity that day and whether they will be able to provide food for their family with the blockade being there.”