Shameless young man turns on air conditioning at home

Impudent, careless local teen Omar al-Dawwad turned on the air conditioning in his home Monday, in a shameless and inconsiderate act that prompted his father to remind him that he was not the CEO of a bank nor had he recently inherited a fortune.

Dawwad’s father said his son took advantage of being alone in the house to turn on the AC, thinking his behavior would not be discovered.

“It was only by divine intervention that I forgot my wallet at home and had to go back, only to catch him in the middle of his brazen act, at the height of pleasuring himself by sitting right in front of the AC, enjoying its cool breeze,” he said.

The father said in an interview that he was crestfallen when he saw the AC’s fan spinning from outside the house, prompting him to hurry inside lest any of the neighbors see what was unfolding.

“My son, my own flesh and blood, did this,” he said. “He has never seen me turn on the AC for myself or for his own mother, even when the plastic of the AC itself starts to melt from the heat, but he elects to turn it on for himself alone.”

He added that Omar’s behavior was a direct result of being excessively spoiled by his mother.

“When he was young, she would bathe him in hot water in winter and would turn on the heating so he doesn’t get sick,” he said.

Dawwad’s father said he would ground his son until he recovers from the financial calamity caused by turning on the AC.

“He will now spend two hours daily in the sun starting at noon to cleanse his sins,” he said.